The Zombie Recipe: Not Just a Mixed Drink Anymore

Todd Jepperson

So, do you remember our review of Jonathan Maberry’s novel, Patient Zero? (here) In that review, we mentioned that Maberry’s monsters were infected by a weaponized form of the Prion disease Fatal Familial Insomnia. Well, it may be that the writers for Popular Science magazine read our post. A couple weeks ago, they posted an article exploring the method by which these nasty little pseudo-proteins could shift the human machine into extinction overdrive.


In summary, the article covers Zombies from Haiti to Hollywood, and takes a little pause in between to demonstrate real world examples of the living dead in nature. It goes on to quote a guy named Steven Schlozman (author of The Zombie Autopsies) as he describes the war a Z-virus would have to wage on the human brain. They submit that the most likely scenario for this to happen would be infection by a “proteinaceous infectious particle, a prion”. The article then chases prions through the course of history back to a tribe of New Guinea cannibals who practiced none other than the eating of human brains.


It will only take about ten minutes to read the article, but it could take the rest of your life to come to terms with what you find there. Now might be a good time to start stockpiling that food storage. You don’t wait ‘til you’re thirsty to start digging a well and you don’t wait ‘til the world ends to start preparing for the apocalypse. You can view the full article by popping up on the other side of this link. Didn’t I tell you Zombies were real? You can’t say we didn’t warn you.

Gather the Infected: We have a Cure!

Todd Jepperson

It’s no secret that Zombies exist. From Haiti to the Pacific Islands, creatures have been and are being rendered vapid, shambling machines; void of any trace of their former selves. These creatures often become slaves to the master who created them. It’s real. It happens. My curiosity begins after that. What if these cadaverous wretches went berserk? What if it was decided that they were only to consume and destroy? In the words of the great Alice Cooper: Welcome to my nightmare.

A little while ago, Researchers at Ben-Gurion University of the Negev—in the desert of Israel—dug up one small key in the development of modern Zombie science. Their study focused on the Emerald Cockroach Wasp and its ability to turn desert roaches, many times their size, into mobile buffets. The process begins by the wasp stinging the roach one time for submission, then one precise headshot, directly into the brain. The final sting results in the roach being fully alive and able to function; but, without voluntary control of its own body. The wasp then leads the roach along by the antennae, as if on a leash, back to the hive where it lays a single egg in its belly. That egg hatches and completes one of nature’s most horrific parasite-host rituals by devouring the living roach one bite at a time.



Imagine for a moment, if you will, the insects are no longer insects. Instead, the wasp is a microscopic, virus cell and the roach… well the roach is sweet old Mrs. Nickerbacher down the street. Instead of dragging her back to the hive, the virus compels her to seek, at all costs, another host and breech the tissue thereof so that the virus could then spread. Has anyone seen 28 Weeks Later?

Breathe Easy. Researchers discovered that the second sting, the money shot, deactivates the neurotransmitter Octopamine, which is responsible for some part in performing complex activities like getting the hell out of out of dodge, or fighting for your life. They also discovered, and this is the good news, that by injecting the necrotic roaches with another chemical which reactivates Octopamine, they were able to reverse the process. Hell yeah! I’ve never wanted to be a scientist, but sometimes I’d love to have front row seats to Science Theatre.

Zombie Registration Made Easy

Todd Jepperson

A few weeks ago, I stumbled upon something that caught my attention: Zombie Registration!

It took me a few weeks to get this post out for two reasons; one of them being my expectation that they would reply after I tried to contact them and the other being that I had to wait three weeks for my registration document to arrive in the mail.

Although I’m pretty disappointed in their “customer service”, the Supernatural Registration is pure novelty and worth every penny. Hop on over to their website and register as one of the many varieties of mythological type creature thingies for free. They’ll send you an email confirming your registration status and provide you with a link to your electronic registration certificate. My individual registration number is ZM1065051219US.

Also, if you want to shell out $5, they’ll print you up an official paper copy of your license. The document lists exactly the status of your registration, the inhuman activities you’re permitted to commit, and the area in which you’re allowed to commit them. To ice the cake, it comes with a completely illegible pen and ink signature at the bottom to fully authenticate the document.

My opinion? For five bucks, they could probably have printed it on something a little nicer than cheap inkjet paper and maybe, just maybe, they could’ve shipped it in a document envelope without folding it in thirds. Otherwise, it’s exactly what I expected. I, personally, will be framing it and hanging it in my office and have no regrets. You’ll have to decide for yourself whether it’s worth the cash. Check them out at Monsterlicenses.com.

How to Engineer a Zombie Virus

David Brown

Have you ever wondered what real world things could be the catalyst for a zombie virus apocalypse? Do you think to yourself how one would go about engineering a zombie virus? Well George Dvorsky, a Director of Operations for Commune Media, an advertising firm that specializes in marketing science and producer of the Sentient Development blog did. He has compiled at great article that can be seen in its entirety by clicking here. In the article he looks at a number of things associated with a potential zombie virus.

Among things he talks about are the Solanum virus behind the zombie plague as discussed in the Zombie Survival Guide, and how the virus itself works. Think of this as a refresher or introduction depending on your exposure to the aforementioned book. He then goes on to look at things in nature that are zombie like in nature, including things like malaria, dicrocelium dendriticum, hairworms, and even rabies. From this section he then goes on to talking about creating the zombie virus and ends with a discussion on whether we have to worry or not. As I said, this is an interesting read and well worth your time.

Zombie Lecture at Centralia College

Todd Jepperson




Anyone still alive in Centralia, Washington? Grab $5 bucks, ($3 for students) and head over to Centralia College’s Wickstrom Theater Wednesday night at 7 PM to hear all about what’s going on around here. Matt Mogk, founder of the Zombie Research Society (zombieresearch.org) will be giving a lecture called “Zombies, Run!” Where he tries to explain, scientifically, medically, and biologically how the Zombie plague is not only possible, but eminent.

“… Researchers apply scientific knowledge based on newly discovered viruses and animals - like the malformed proteins that cause mad cow disease or a jellyfish-like species found to live on the bed of Mediterranean Sea without oxygen, the Loriciferans ó to determine if a zombie were to show up at your front door, "how would it function, what would it look like, how would it smell?"
source:  The News Tribune

National Geographic – The Truth Behind Zombies

Todd Jepperson

If you’ve still got a T.V. and electricity, you’ll want to tune it to National Geographic Channel Saturday night. Pull up a chair and listen as Max Brooks (author of the best-selling Zombie Survival Guide) and his team explore the Haitian Voodoo roots of Zombies, as they try to explain how they came to be and if they’re more Hollywood myth or reality. Also, meet some people who are apparently more prepared than the rest of us for when the restless dead take over. Grab a pen and paper, take notes, and be ready!

ZombieFit: The Zombie Workout

An exercise class in St. Charles, IL is offering a zombie preparedness fitness class.  Similar to the class in Chicago we mentioned last November, ZombieFit has the goal of making sure you are physically able once the dead rise.

"What if you woke up tomorrow to find your city overridden with zombies, would you survive? This may seem childish, but by preparing for the impossible, you'll be ready for the improbable.
The keys to surviving Z-day are simple: Be able to lift and throw heavy things, run fast and for long distances, and be able to navigate obstacles and urban environments in an efficient manner. By following the ZombieFit WODs (workout of the day) and practicing parkour, you will achieve increased fitness through the performance of functional movements at high intensity and find within yourself the internal discipline and mental fortitude necessary to become a traceur."

Zombie Studies Offered At University of Baltimore

I guess it was only a matter of time. Zombies 101 aka Zombie Studies aka English 333 is the latest course being offered at the University of Baltimore. The course will be taught by Arnold Blumberg, co-author of "Zombiemania: 80 Movies to Die For".

"Right now we're in a massive surge of zombie entertainment," said Blumberg. "On the most basic level, zombies are probably one of the most potent horror icons, one of the closest to us in terms of identification factor, in terms of reflecting ourselves," he said. "The zombie is, simply, us."

Jonathan Shorr, chairman of the University's School of communications design, told the Sun that, "It's a back door into a lot of subjects.They think they're taking this wacko zombie course, and they are. But on the way, they learn how literature and mass media work, and how they come to reflect our times."

Students will watch 16 classic zombie films and read several issues of "The Walking Dead" comic book series from Dark Horse Comics. They are also required to submit research papers, write zombie movie scripts and make drawing boards of zombie films of their own making.

Man, this fires me up! I'm in debt up to my eyeballs paying for a degree I don't even use and had to take classes like Physics and Business Finance! Baltimore isn't the first, though. Columbia College in Chicago has apparently been offering a zombie course for awhile. So why is the course called "English 333"? Because that number is half of 666. I'm not making that up.

Zombies Existed 48 Million Years Ago

Zombies existed 48 million years ago?  Yup...  Sorta.  We reported in a previous post some scientific reasons a real zombie apocalypse could really happen.  One of those reasons cited the mind-controlling power a fungus has over ants.  And this isn't the only time such a phenomenon has been found in nature. 

Basically, a fungus controls the mind and actions of its host.  In this case, an ant, begins to act like a zombie taking itself to the highest point it can find.  Once there, it grasps onto the leaf in what is referred to as a "Death Grip" while it dies.  Once dead, the fungus begins to sprout out of the ant where it can release spores.  The spores spread and start the cycle over again.

Scientists have discovered evidence in a fossilized leaf proving that this behavioral modification has been taking place for over 48 million years!  So how long until this fungus evolves and mutates into one that possesses humans to crave flesh?

Oh, and the pic above?  Said fungus growing out of the back of dead ant's head.

Source: New Scientist

International Politics Professor Discusses Implications of Zombie Uprising

It's been awhile since we last posted about zombies in science. I am always entertained when a person or group views the "what ifs" of a zombie attack in a realistic manner. This is as much fun to read as the reasons a zombie apocalypse could happen and the mathematical model created to simulate a zombie attack.

What we have is an article written by Daniel W. Drezner, a professor of international politics at the Fletcher School of Law and Diplomacy at Tufts University. Head over to the Foreign Policy site to read Drezner's ideas of how the zombie apocalypse may affect foreign affairs. This article has recently been brought back to life (pun intended) because of Drezner's upcoming book, Theories of International Politics and Zombies. It will be released by Princeton University Press this December.

Drezner recently had more to say on the subject in a more recent feature at Foreign Policy. It's definitely worth your time if you are interested in a logical approach as to the implications of a global attack of the undead.

"The specter of an uprising of reanimated corpses also poses a significant challenge to interpreters of international relations and the theories they use to understand the world. If the dead begin to rise from the grave and attack the living, what thinking would -- or should -- guide the human response? How would all those theories hold up under the pressure of a zombie assault? When should humans decide that hiding and hoarding is the right idea?"

Real Plants That Help During the Zombie Apocalypse

The only thing I like as much as zombies in my toys is zombies in my science. Practical advice regarding the "what fers" of everything zombie is just plain 'ol fun to read. Truth Is Treason just posted an article titled, Houseplants You'll Want to be Growing During the Zombie Apocalypse of 2014. The article is full of practical advice that tells you which plants you'll want nearby when you're bunkered in your safety zone. What I want to know is how they know the zombie apocalypse will be in 2014?

Some are obvious. Of course it would be beneficial to have an aloe plant. I remember putting cutting them open when I would get burns as a child. Others, like the Venus Flytrap, I had never thought of. I mean, the decaying corpses are bound to draw flies, right?

It's a fun read and one I stumbled upon because of Awesome Apocalypse, another blog I just found. Do you like reading about end of the world scenarios? Of course, you do! So go check out AA.

The Government WILL Be The Cause Of The Zombie Apocalypse

Admit it, you have fantasized about the zombie apocalypse. Don’t be ashamed, I think everyone reading has their strategy planned and if you don’t… well, you’ll be one of the first to go. And for those of you who don’t think that it can (or will) happen, I have some sorry news. It looks like the government is looking for ways to “freeze” all bodily functions including heart beat and brain activity and then reanimate the corpse. The military’s Darpa team has given 9.9 million to the Texas A&M Institute to study ways to extend the time in which a dead or dying soldier can be brought back to life.

Of course, the uses only begin with the military. I don’t think this kind of “medicine” is a bad idea. I think it’s a great idea if we can develop a way to stop a soldier, and eventually, civilian from dying in order to get them treatment. I only bring this to your attention as further proof that a mistake could eventually be made. I mean, you have seen 28 Days Later, right?

Want the full story? Head over to Wired.com to read about the zombie pigs.

For more evidence that the zombie apocalypse could happen, check out some previous posts.

Zombie Outbreak Simulator

So what do you get when you take the zombie outbreak simulator I posted earlier and mix it with Google Maps? A freaking good time!

Tina was kind enough to inform me of a new zombie outbreak simulator that's available. It's a Google Maps view of Washington DC that allows you to make a few adjustments. You determine the speed of the zombies, how many armed civilians there are, how many police are in the area, and even the accuracy of everyone. Then, you sit back and let the carnage begin. The downside? It has been proven yet again that when the dead rise, we don't stand a chance.

University of Florida Removes Zombie Attack Plan

Following up on a report I posted, oh... 5 minutes ago, The Associated Press just released the news that the University of Florida removed their Zombie Contigency Plan. From the AP website:

GAINESVILLE, Fla. — The University of Florida's response plans for a zombie apocalypse are no longer available for public consumption.

UF spokesman Steve Orlando said Friday the university removed a link to a disaster recovery exercise, which detailed how the school could respond to an outbreak of the undead. The link was taken down late Thursday afternoon.

Orlando says officials felt the joke "didn't really belong" on the site, which also included plans for dealing with hurricanes and pandemics.

The exercise lays out the university's response to attacks by "flesh-eating, apparently life impaired individuals." It notes that a zombie outbreak might include "documentation of lots of strange moaning."

Orlando says the employee who wrote the gag wasn't punished.

Copyright © 2009 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.

University of Florida Preparing for Zombie Apocalypse

You can sleep better at night if your children are attending the University of Florida in Gainsville. On the school's website, along with information on what to do during a hurricane or pandemic, is a plan for responding to the undead.

The plan explains how students should respond to attacks by "flesh-eating, apparently life impaired individuals." It also mentions that an outbreak of zombies may include "documentation of lots of strange moaning."

A University of Florida spokesman says the exercise was written to “add a little bit of levity” to disaster preparation discussions.

"Vacation Zombie" image courtesy of Billy Tackett.

'Experts' Explain Why We Like Zombies

CNN.com tracked down some zombie "experts" to find out why we love zombies so much. I can't believe they didn't call me! It's an entertaining look at our favorite subject so head over there to take a look.

Here's a snippet I took from the article with words from Max Brooks about the questions he gets asked:

Instead of questions about writing, he said he often gets asked about the best type of ammunition to kill a zombie or the best way to prepare your house for the coming onslaught.

"I'd say 90 percent are saying, 'We all know it's fake; we're playing along,' " he said. "The other 10 percent are saying, 'We're ready!'

"And I'd say 10 percent of that 10 percent can't wait for it to happen."

How Long Would You Survive?

I just found a pretty entertaining quiz you should all go take. You answer a few questions about yourself and it tells you how long after being bitten before you turn into a zombie. I've got 1 hour, 18 minutes. It's a good thing I'd never get bitten!

Go take the test yourself by clicking here.

More Scientifically-Proven, Live-Saving Advice For Surviving Attacks From The Undead

The science of zombies and zombie survival is one of my favorite topics to read about. Unfortunately, it'll probably take you longer to read the title of this post than the post itself...

The Escapist posted an article centered around the thoughts of physicist Davide Cassi from the Università di Parma in Italy. Cassi asked himself, "If I were being chased by predatory 'random walkers,' what would be the best hiding place to maximize my chances of survival?" Of course, we both know that "random walkers" are zombies.

Cassi used a physics model he calls the random walking model to predict the zombies' movement. This simple movement does not take into consideration a zombie's ability to "hunt" nor your ability to defend yourself. The model did prove that your best chances of survival are higher if you remain motionless in a complex structure. Hospitals, schools, malls, or any place with a vast amount of rooms, stairs, floors, and hallways will be your key to survival.

To (kinda) see this model in action, check out the previous post about the Zombie Attack Simulator.

Click here to read more posts about the science of zombies.

5 Zombie Survival Tactics That Will Get You Killed

Another classic zombie article brought to us by cracked.com, 5 Popular Zombie Survival Tactics (That Will Get You Killed). The last article I posted from cracked was 5 Scientific Reasons the Zombie Apocalypse Could Happen and is an absolute must read.

So what are the 5 survival tactics that will get you killed? I'll post some excerpts below, but I highly suggest you click here and read the whole article for yourself.

#5) Raiding the Gun Store

"...even if you already have the god-king of firearms at your disposal, you're still not ready. You need to arm everybody in your group, you need spares just in case and you need ammo. In short, you need to get to the gun store.
The only problem being: So does everybody else."

#4) Get Out Of Town

"Blindly following your knee-jerk flee response has dropped you straight in the middle of Super-Rush-Hour, a hellish place where you sit futilely trapped in a confined space, surrounded by people who may or may not already be infected, but are certainly standing around looking delicious to the zombie hordes. You just wanted to get out as quickly as possible, but now look at you: Stuck in an unmoving meat-line with a thousand other morsels and the only thing your car is doing is keeping the freshness in until the ravenous human can-openers get there."

#3) Fortify Your Base

"Zombies don't get bored or impatient, they need nothing to keep them alive (because they're, you know, not) and they're not really known for their logistic prowess: No cons will be weighed here. Food is a pro. You are food. You are there. So there are only pros here. They will wait for you forever. But you will run out of supplies eventually, and every day you stay put in your nigh-invulnerable bunker is another day zombies pile up outside."

#2) Conserve Ammo: Use Melee Weapons When Possible

"The zombie apocalypse is a rough and tumble place, and most of us manage to rack up ER-worthy papercuts even at our current passive office jobs. In short: You're going to have open wounds, and exploding heads tends to be a bloody affair. So if all body fluids infect, blood included, then bites are the least of your worries."

#1) Always Aim For The Head

"Headshots are impressive in movies and video games because they're the hardest of all possible shots. Taking your time and waiting for the right moment is all well and good if you're picking off roamers for a disturbing afternoon's entertainment on a leisurely Sunday picnic, but if shit goes down and you're faced with a crowd of zombies (they do tend to crowd, you see, quite rude like that) your last concern should be surefire kills, it should be getting the fuck out of there, finding a safe corner to sob in, and then finding a change of pants (in that order)."

From The Science Channel: Is It A Good Idea To Study Zombie Attacks?

The only thing more entertaining than zombie news is zombie news taken seriously. Back in August, I posted about the mathematical model created to determine tactics to surviving a zombie attack. That bit of news seems to still be going strong. In fact, The Science Channel's Patrick J. Kiger talks about zombie attacks in his blog. Is This A Good Idea? is a blog where Patrick addresses such topics as global warming, animal hybrids, and cloning.

So... Is This A Good Idea? Preparedness For Zombie Attacks? is the latest topic addresses. Patrick goes as far as saying, "I would argue that unlike many of the things we fear, there actually is at least a possible, albeit tenuous, basis in reality for concern about zombies" citing the great article on How Stuff Works as proof that zombies just could happen. Patrick continues, "But whether real or imagined, a zombie attack is a potent metaphor. Think of the undead not as klutzy cannibals but as the X factor... the totally unexpected menace that suddenly confronts us."